A Month out of Country Nov 2018
Where to begin? Did I ever think I would have almost a month off and travel to two other countries ? Definitely not. I didn't mean for it to happen but two opportunities arose that I knew I could not pass on. I have a few women who I look up to and would call my mentors, two of them had retreats happening in the same month. Something told me I had to be at both. I knew the month would be transformational but I had no idea how much. I took the leap of faith and made it happen.
First I went to Mexico for a healing and transformation retreat, including a vegan detox, breath-work meditations and yoga. I needed it and was so ready for it. I had been slacking on my vegetarian diet, my yoga practice and my emotional well-being. I told myself November would be my month to get myself back. I ate delicious vegan food all week, fresh fruit and juices daily. My body began craving it, craving watermelon, grapes, kiwi, bananas, all the fresh fruit. It needed the detox just like my mind and heart did from negative self talk and patterns I had created.
I learned a lot about myself and what was holding me back from stepping into my power. I connected and learned with other women. I took time alone, away from people in my life back home to feel into my own energy. Connect to my intuition and listen to what my soul really needs. I read books on the beach, soaked in the sun and ate fresh fruits and veggies. I faced some of my shadow side, my not so pretty qualities. I heard the truth of what people saw and felt in me. I broke down, I cried, I doubted myself and my path. The breath-work meditations helped me with some breakthroughs and I allowed myself to break down to my core.
I came home, slightly shattered, for a few days, re-packed and took off to Thailand all by myself. I met a group of 16 people there. We all went for training of some sort. I did abdominal and karsai, a yoni massage training. I chose these to help others release toxins, negative emotions and past traumas. Not knowing how much I would be doing the same while practicing it. I met a man in my abdominal training who had done the karsai training already and needed practice. So I allowed this man into my sacred space to help me heal, release and grow. The energetics of this was powerful and the physical even more so. I had 3 sessions done in 2 weeks and, wow the emotions and changes it brought up! I could go on and on. If you'd like to hear more please feel free to reach out to me personally.
Thailand itself is a magical, deeply healing place to be. I made life-long friendships with strangers. I went out dancing while staying sober for the first time. I was learning how to be myself without unhealthy habits. I went to a cacao ceremony on the Full Moon and Lantern festival. We sat in a circle and sang songs. A cute little orange cat wandered into my lap where I pet it and gazed into her deep eyes and sang from my soul. We continued to lock eyes and exchanging love. It felt like she was my little baby, a soul connection I already had just coming to say hello. Then we went around in a circle, moving and finding our way to new people. Each time stopping and connecting at a soul level with the person in front of us. We wrote down on lanterns what we wanted to let go of, what we wanted to release. And let me tell you, I had a long list! We lit those babies on fire and let them go. I watched as they floated away into the stars. The full moon was kissing my soul as I surrendered to it's power. The sounds the jungle was making and the feeling of a fresh start brought such inner peace.
This was in the town of Pai, high up in the mountains. A place I had never been but felt like home in more than one way.
We went to a small community that gave free lunches on Sunday to anyone who came. They grew their own food, traded with locals and came together in love to give back. We ate delicious organic food and talked to all the travelers around. I got my flow flags out and began playing and dancing around. I met people with similar interests and hobbies. I wanted to stay forever. Pai is a town I will definitely be visiting again.
I realized how much of me desired more. I was ready to pack up my stuff and go travel the world! I did not want to go home, not because home life was bad in any way but because this country had so much to offer. I came home and I felt like a different person. I did not belong in Minnesota any longer. I went to work and it drained my soul, the vibration was so much lower. I hung-out with family and friends I had known for years and I felt out of place. We did not have much to talk about. Yes I could talk about my travels and life at a surface level but not the real deep healing I wanted to address. I noticed how much I have changed the last year or two and even more over this month. It took awhile to get comfortable being back home but I am happy now. I know what I must do. My soul is calling me out to adventure more.